KMHHH 150^th

^{Rear Ender’s 100 Hounds, Hares, and Hurls}

^{15, December, 2001}

Twas the night of Rear Ender’s 100^th Run

And all through the town,

She could be heard

Throwing up her Down Downs.

But before her nose was inches from the ground,

As she hurled on Bitter Road,

She and Deep Throat hared our Christmas run.

On-On cried the hounds,

As they ran after,

On –On Lazy Mother F*cker,

On-On Penis Pumper

On-On Chicken Ph*cker

And On –On Horse’s Ass

And when they arrived at the end with a clatter,

Straight at the beer cooler, they did gather.

In tinsel and garland they were adorned,

Like the tackiest float in a Christmas Parade

To passers by what a sight they made.

But come they did from near and far,

All to honor our beloved Rear Ender.

And honor her we did,

And with each award another beer.

The Hashshite, the Stud, and the Mop Squeezer,

Were the awards we gave to her,

But soon enough she began to sway,

Maybe because she’d put half a keg of Shiner beer away

So we decided we should call it a day,

We performed the closing hash hymn,

Which Rear Ender lead, to Scratch n’ Sniff’s satisfaction.

And this is how it came to be,

That Rear Ender could reach her nose past her knees,

On – On Fire In The Hole

Quotes Of The Week:

a “Look Out, Beaver, comin’ through.” – Skid Marks

a “Always get out of the way for Beaver.” – Deep Throat

a “Just go slow going over it, you’ll need help getting up to do it.” – Lazy Mother F*cker

a “Do you want to be double stuffed?” – Roxy Moron

a “Why don’t you just swallow, finish, and then talk to me?” – Roxy Moron

a “Look, the Stud’s strapless.” – Skid Marks

a “My ass is out of control.” – Lazy Mother F*cker

a “Deep Throat, I don’t want you’re old crusty one.” – Rear Ender

a “Don’t screw me again Forest!” – Fire In The Hole

a “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt you while you were scratching your balls Forest.” –

Deep Throat

a “The head on that isn’t my fault, I wasn’t the pumper.” – Boner

a “Chicken, you pussy, get on your knees and drink like a man.” – Rear Ender

a “Come feel my candycane” – Moby Dick

a “Lazy’s popping his squirrel nuts.” – Rear Ender