KMHHH # 112

 

Deep Throat’s “Woods” of Wisdom

12, August, 2000

 

In an effort to escape the heat, and the hounds, our honorable Religious Advisor, and Hare, Deep Throat led the Kiss my Hash House Harriers, “in to the woods.”  It wasn’t exactly, “the hundred acre wood,” but it was long enough for the hounds to work up a thirst. As the Down-Down began Deep Throat invited the night Multiples: Saturday Night Beaver (10), Moby Dick (50), Blows A lot (10), and No Name Tom (5) into the Circle.  Next, the pack “chipped” in to give Tom his official hash name.  Suggestions included: Butt Ranger, Butt Shacker, Company Command Her, Shrinkage Happens, and Shit Stain. These however, were not to be. Hence forth Tom will be known as Skid Marks!

 

By now it was long past due to bring the “cherry wood”, or Virgins into the Circle. After several attempts : Shelly, Carey, Matt, Brian, Kevin, Lisa, Di, and Susane all made it out of the Circle, along with their sponsors. The quickest to reach the wood (FRB) was Anal Flour, while the last one in the woods (DFL) was Scratch n’ Sniff.  From fast to slow the pack moved onto size. The “big wood” or Stud award caused a flurry of nominations. Claiming the wood in front of the entire hash was Little Woody, for being such a good sport at the last hash. Little Woody was also the night’s “rotted” wood, as the Hashshite winner, for forgetting to hare!

 

Whining her way to the Mop Swueezer award was Rear Ender.  Rear Ender was also lucky enough to join her fellow violators: Deep Throat, Her Royal Hein Ass, Chicken Ph*cker, Fire In The Hole, Butt Rogers, and Blows A Lot for a ceremonial pint. Last, but not least it was time for the “warped” wood to enter the Circle,. Butt Rogers, Blows A Lot, Skid Mark, Moby Dick, Lazy Mother F*cker, Forest Hump, and the grand champion Anal flour conspired to torture us all with their Jerry Lewis Jokes.

 

On – On

Fire In The Hole

 

Quotes of the Week:

_ “This Wood is too long!” – Saturday Night Beaver

_ “I wouldn’t mind it wider, just not as long!”- Fire In The Hole

_ Wood you hold my stick, Beaver?” – Little Woody

_ “Are we still doing virgins?” – Anal Flour

_ “You blow for 5 seconds, scream, yell, and then POW!” – Deep Throat

_ “Strap On really knows how to blow!” – Saturday Night Beaver

 

112th Hashers were: Anal Flour, Analrexic, Blows A Lot, Captain Cathader, Chicken Ph*cker, Come Here Damit, Deep Throat, Fire In The Hole, Fists of Fury, For F*ck’s Sake, Forest Hump. Her Royal Hein Ass, High Maintenance, Le Femme Nikita, Little Woody, Master Gator, Moby Dick, Rambutt, Rear Ender, Saturday Night Beaver, Strap On,  Tits Everywhere, Butt Rogers, Catherine, Kelly, Laxy Mother F*cker, Skid Mark, Di, John, Shelly, Carey, Matt, Lisa, Brian, Kevin, Mike,  and Mountain Mam Man.