KMHHH # 89

"Dousing Down-Downs"
23, October, 1999

The Hounds ran a short trail laid by Hares, Up & Out & Horse's Ass only to be "submerged" by an extra long Down-Down. The beer began to flow with Up & Out neglecting his official hare headgear and Horse's Ass for setting the tone by transfusing part of her beer to No Name Sharon.

Following the Hares, the Virgins: Kermit and Pusher were "baptized" into the Kiss My Hash House Harriers. Kermit doubly so, who after whining found his illegal headgear "marinated" in beer and then stomped in a coating of dirt. Kermit also "mopped up" the competition of Horse's Ass, Rear Ender, and Fire in the Hole for the Mop Squeezer Award. He was also awarded with a "moon beam" from Gee Whiz for having sodden her mop.

Somewhere between all of this the Front Running Bastard (FRB) Roasted Nuts and DFLs (Dead Fucking Last) Rear Ender and Gee Whiz "immersed" themselves in the Circle. They were followed by the Multiples: Hoover (15), Deep Throat (60), Fist of Fury (30), Rear Ender (40), NN Sharon (5), and Captain Catheter (5). As the KMHHH is "soaked" in tradition, the five timers were duly named. Suggestions for Captain Catheter included: Rips His Cord, Itchin’ For Bitchin’, Major Pain In The Ass, and Prostate Pumper. Despite the Hounds urging he rejected our chosen name Pecker Checker and kept his original. Suggestions for No Name Sharon included: Weeble, Timber, Crash Test dummy, Gravity Chick, and Teeter Tauter. None however, was as popular or Titter Twatter.

But it was the awarding of the Hashshit that began the real dousing. Rear Ender was bestowed the Hashshit after claiming she couldn’t get it twice. After "bathing" the RA, Deep Throat with the precious froth & foam she was nearly "drowned" by him "dousing" her with an entire mug of beer. But Rear Ender’s retaliation was swift and she "beered and floured" Deep Throat.

While all the "sloppy" shenanigans led to much alcohol abuse it also produced the evening’s Stud. Going far beyond Gee Whiz’s "moon river", Up & Out’s double hare, and Fire In The Hole’s defense of Rear Ender by beating John Doe with the Hashshit was Le Femme Nikita, who did his part in recycling by drinking the beer squeezings from Rear Ender’s shirt.

By this point the Violators were many: Moby Dick, Deep Throat, Rear Ender, Up & Out and company. From there the pack "plunged" into the awarding of the Jerry Lewis Award. Contenders for the worst joke were, TeKillYa Tits, Horse's Ass, and Roasted Nuts. Before the hounds were completely "drained" they left the Down-Down a little wetter than when they began and floated to Legends for the On-After.

On-On
Fire In The Hole